Stumped!!!

So as I sit down tonight, I realize I am so stumped on what I am going to really blog about. Though I’ve got several different ideas going thru my head tonight I am at odds on really on full subject. At the same time I sit down to really start plugging away, I look over to see ~D~ with a handful of plastic hangers. While normally most people would think “oh, okay that’s not a big deal, but oh my dear friend” it sure is a biggie… when ~D~ is my 16 month old…lol…hehe.. While she is having such a blast running rapid throughout the house and smacking everything and anything in the house, I am so afraid everything is going to slam on the floor….lol..So, I must stop what I am doing, like always, A mothers job is never done…Play bad guy and put all the hangers away like my 13 year old should have done while she was putting laundry away, since that’s the only way the little one could have gotten them, is if the oldest left them out for the little one to get them. I call that pure laziness, yep. I must sound like I am going on a tangent and I really wasn’t planning for that when I started this out. Okay so got that out of my system…lol..

So, I rented a new movie last night for the little one and well, ME too!!! A mom can still like cute cartoonish movies too!! So I guess this would be my input on the newest movie out!!

HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA!!! Not very often does one look cute enough to really, I mean really catch my attention but this one did. And it was by far a winner…I was so cute and funny it certainly caught my attention and the attention of a very very active and very curious and into everything that isn’t hers 16 month old little girl. I so recommend this to any family that has the chance to rent a movie for a night because you wont be upset. I am actually going to buy it for her next week if I have to count the last pennies I have. She watched it today like 3 separate times and I must say it is the best babysitter ever!!!

So I have to say that was my 1st ever movie mom review, hopefully everyone liked and maybe there will be more.

I gotta tell ya, I am in so much pain, this weather in Wisconsin so far is just killing me. I mean the ups and downs and now we are getting pounded with snow. Every muscle and joint in my body is just freaken screaming at me, and mind you its not screamin very nice at me…lol…I’m serious, for me to make it thru a day is a miracle. Thank fully the doctors the doctors have been nice enough to start changing my meds around to help me with the pain and also the nerve pain is horrendous as well. Its a miracle I can get out of bed some days and I’m not exaggerating, since after my 1st back surgery I had 6 severely pinched nerves and its just gotten worse since then that my pain doctor keeps asking me how my nerves are doing with the new meds because she knows how bad they affect me.

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My night out!!!

So yesterday was my day out!!! yayyy, it was great, a day for myself to be me. It was a day without kids and just a day to me kelly. Not a mom or anything else, I was more or less free if you want to call it that. So I had various stops before the fun started, and my long drive ensued. It was almost a 3 hour drive that I knew was going to kill me but to my surprise for the very first time the drive down there was great. My back didn’t hurt. I guess the new combination of medications are finally working and its wonderful I must say. Who would have known me, yes me would have picked the right medications to aid in my pain control. I guess doctors don’t know it all. lol…So on Monday that is the big day when I call my pain doctor and tell her I need a full script of Lyrica cause that seems to be one the mystery drugs that is aiding in my pain relief along with the rest of the medications. They are all working together to help me out. So, after my couple stops…I was on the road to enjoy my 2 hour road trip by this time. Music blaring and mountain dew in hand I am a happy camper…

Well, I finally meet up with ~S~, and we get everything packed in the car and we are off again, for another 30 min drive which I am now completely lost..lol…Good thing he is driving…lol..Well, we get to where we are suppose to be and cars are everywhere and the house is absoultley gorgeous and to my amazement….Everyone is wearing either socks, slippers or sandles…RESPECT…Yep they all had respect for someone else’s house. Its amazing there are still some people out there that has respect for other people’s things…AMAZING…lol….

It was awesome when we got there, I was so welcomed and it felt great for once. I haven’t felt so wanted somewhere and so welcomed somewhere it was so awesome. I met so many new people and some I had met before. So everyone stood around and munched on some really great finger food before the fun at what they call “Bar Olympics , So I must say sorry to my partner ~N~ because I really sucked cause we lost 2 games in which mean’t we lost first round and then lost the losers bracket…If only we would have been able to get picked for darts…I would have rocked…but no….we had basketball and WII bowling…which I did horrible at…but yet we still had a blast at…lol…and that’s what counts…right????

The problem I seem to have tho is separating myself from being a mom and just having fun, what I mean is still talking about my kids and showing pictures or even talking about my back sometimes. How does a mother separate herself from that. Is it possible to go somewhere and not talk about her kids and show pictures at all. That’s my question to anyone that reads this blog post. Can you as a mom when you go out to have fun completely separating  yourself and not talk about your babies for a single night? As hard as I tried it was like the more i did it. lol…It was crazy, I wonder if anyone was sick of hearing about my girls…I sure hope not and i hope no one got sick of hearing about anything else I talked about and i hope I didn’t leave a bad taste in anyone’s mouth ya know. Tho I did talk with one person about my blog and when we were all leaving he did remember talking about and asked me the name of my blog and when I told him it he chuckled and said how cute of a name, and how perfect. So that made me feel great. hehe.

So, as I made my journey home, yes the nice 2 and half hour drive I did alot of thinking and I really wanted to make my blog post last night but I was just too darn tired but I wish you all a great Sunday and see ya’ll tomorrow with some more random ramblings…lol…

Love ya’ll

Kelly lynn

Babies and Glasses!!!

So about 3-6 months we finally took the little stinker in to get her eyes looked at because not only was she looking at us cross eyed more often than we really liked her to but her right eye was also turning in quite often. While it was cute at first when she would look at us cross eyed…lol.. but then it started getting us worried. So I first talked to her baby doctor and he referred me to the local eye doctor, who btw what exellent with her. I must say after literally fighting with a 1 year old to sit still so the doctor could look at her eye and apparently everyone…I repeat eyeryone could hear her in the waiting room. I must have sounded like I was killing my poor child cause I know sitting there holding her still was quite a struggle. I wouldnt suggest it to anyone…lol…Even my worst enemy…hehe…Should have seen the looks I got when I came out, I had to say, “What she’s fine, I wasn’t hurting her, just ask the doctor. Sheesh’. Needless to say I am not shy when people look at me funny like I am hurting my child or something and I am so not. Later on I’ll tell you a story about a lady who tried to tell me her opinion on how SHE THOUGHT I SHOULD NOT ONLY RAISE MY OLDEST BUT TALK TO HER AS WELL, needless to say she was about 2, I believe and we were at the airport for atleast 3 hours longer than necessary and it was just rediculous and I was at my wits end with my oldest and this lady. I will save that for its own blog post. lol…So back to the eye doctor. After we finished the exam and I was looked apon like I just beat the absolute shit out my child. We decided while we were out and about we should go get her fitted for glasses. 

So we ventured over to Shopko, Since the eye doctor has an optical place right they but would you believe they don’t accept medicare…REALLY!!!!! Are you serious….So inconvient. Anywhoo…We went over to where I get my exam and glasses cause I know they accept it and the eye place actually told me to go there!!! So we get there all ready to get this over with and get the glasses order for little miss…NOPE….OF COURSE….JUST MY LUCK…Apparently, they don’t have a big demand for little ones glasses so the kit they have, they have to send for when requested for and then send back. So I put in my request for it and now I have to wait and the lady tells me “Well, I’m not sure when we will get it in.” I told her well, could you request for it to be rushed cause I kinda need it asap…Really lady could you be a little understanding??? 

So now the waiting game…Yep, that’s exactly what we did, and they acted like ho hum…no biggie..Finally, I called and raised holey hell, since it was almost a month since we were in there and her appointment was in a month, and would you believe 2 days later, I get a phone call that the kit mysteriously arrived…hmmmm….So we looked at all of them and little miss was so good as she just sat there while we tried several pairs on her and finally found the pair that fit her perfectly…They were meant for her, seriously…

The eye doctor was amazed how well the glasses were doing their job and to this date, still having issue of her keeping them on…I feel like a failure cause I cant get her to keep them on…If anyone reads this…Any ideas…So today, she has them on and would you believe she bent the one arm, so here we go to Shopko to get them fixed, Thank god it doesn’t cost to get them fixed my only fear is if she has to be with…Oh well…it is what it is….

Well, off to do errands, have a great day…

Love ya’ll.

Kelly Lynn!!!

Kids…The things they do!!!

So what does a mom do when she has exhausted all things imaginable?? I mean when is enough really enough. I know kids will be kids but honestly I feel like I am fighting a loosing battle and I am drowning. Lets see, I will list them and you tell me if it looks like I am downing or just imagining it..lol,.

  • Constantly having to remind about the little chores she has. This is everyday type of constant.
  • Not appreciative of the things given, not even acknowledge that she have nice things…
  • Hence the none appreciative things…Lost not one AT&T smart phone, but 2, yes 2 smart phone, but this time told me right away unlike the last time.
  • waits til last minute to do homework, or plays catch up after the assignment is due to turn it in.
  • Lies about stupid and silly things, and then acts like I am stupid for catching her and then cant once again acknowledges that she is even wrong, even when she is busted.
  • For example, the lying part, She fell asleep, got busted for sleeping, no chores or homework done and tried to say she vacuumed. I know when my carpet is vacuumed, plus everything down to the wipes were still in the same place before I left, cause I left them there. Busted….Took about 20 minutes and then she finally fessed.
  • Case in point…the other night, she goes into the bathroom, shes in there for like 30 minutes…Don’t hear a single noise, cough, sneeze…nothing…So I go to the door and knock. Still nothing..So I said her name…A couple rather 5 seconds later I hear a rather soft “yeah”, and then she opens the door and turns out the lights. I asked her what she was doing. Now, I know when she is sleeping, Christ she has fallen asleep in the bathroom before but…I can tell when she is abruptly woken up…I asked her what the hell she was doing..wouldn’t answer me…Frustrated I asked her, were you sleeping…This is what she tells me…NO shit…”I was working on my computer, and turns to look at the bathroom, like it was going to jump out and save her or something..” I was like huh…lol..Irritated now, I’m like hey..you weren’t do that you were sleeping…no I wasn’t she admittedly swears…I come back and say, I can see it on your face, hear it in your voice and girl, you were in the bathroom for 30 minutes…Ya never flushed the toilet….GIVE IT UP…YOUR BUSTED BIG TIME…

So today, she comes home to tell me, after I had called her several times and text her to see if she wanted a ride home from school being that it is so cold out and she never answered me. So she walked home. Well, now I know why she didn’t call or text me…Anywhoo….lol…What amazes me is that she told the office but failed to tell the officer on duty that could have done something…ugh…So in 2 months, after telling her this was THE last phone you are ever getting unless you pay for one on your own…Amazingly for whatever reason she takes it to gym class and someone steals it, instead of leaving it in her backpack where it would been locked up nice and tight….argggg…lol…

So what am I to do….I am so close to sending her to Utah where they have the military school for youth that basically are misbehaving and whatnot…I just cant handle it..She disrespects me and disrespects herself more importantly…Not the way I raised her at all. Now her Principal sees something magical and something promising in her..I just wish she saw it in herself. I used to see it before, now she has kind of given up on herself and just let go…I know she can do so much more, but she WONT….

 

Anywhoo….I give up…I’m lost and just don’t know what to do with her anymore, I get no help from her father and I am reading this new book called, Parenting Teens with Love & Logic by Foster Cline,MD & Jim Fay. Its a very interesting book, its all about “Preparing Adolescents for Responsible Adulthood” (Foster Cline, Jim Fay, 2006) So far its really interesting as i just started, her principal just gave it to me to read, it definitely gave me a new perspective on raising a teenager.

Love,

Me!!!

Pain~~~The hidden illness

Why me?? Why me, I ask myself..I ask myself that each and everyday. Its just not fair for my girls as well as for me. So if your reading I bet your wondering, why is this crazy woman blogging about this….Well…there’s a reason to my madness. Recently, I went to my new Rhumetologist and he confirmed what was previously diagnosed but not diagnosed. Confusing I know, but hey its life. On top of what I am already dealing with now I have to deal with this new stuff. This new stuff I mean, Fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue syndrome and Arthritis. Yep, not one or maybe two…but 3…Lucky me huh?? So my next question to him was..well, what do we do and what are you going to give me to help with these flair ups that I have been having because I have been doing my research and I know that I have been having serious, painful, fibro flair ups. Not these ones that you can just get through the day by a asperine, btw…I don’t take…but you know the kind that actually puts me out of commission. 

I was literally out of commission for Christmas day, broke my heart, New years day…yep that one too…and not by other substances…There has been other times due to the weather..Yes the weather. Mother nature here in Wisconsin sucks severely and she is not very kind by any means. Well, he says….You have to call your other doctors and see what they want to prescribe you because I don’t feel comfortable prescribing you anything due to the other medications that you are on. GET OUT THE FRONT DOOR!!!! You mean I have to wait again, and do my own work, call my own doctors and have them prescribe my med’s…SERIOUSLY…I mean I get it…but alot of the medications that I am on already treat the conditions you just diagnosed me with!!!! 

I felt defeated, back to the drawing board…I literally cried all the way home because I knew, just knew it would be a couple more days of calling the other doctors and explaining the situation and quite frankly at this moment, 3:30 p.m. I didn’t have the energy to explain anything to anyone…I wanted to crawl under a blanket forever…FOREVER!!! lol… See, I am not sure what it is and if anyone can explain it to me as to why I do this but I get in a mood where I don’t want to talk to anyone or I just don’t have the energy to talk to anyone…So I knew how my following day was looking to be like.

  • Call each doctor
  • Either talk to the nurse or leave a detailed message, sometimes I don’t always explain myself the best. So hopefully I explain to their understanding.
  • If I get voicemail, wait for a call back.
  • Then wait for them to talk to the doctor and then wait for another call back

So, the next day went better than I actually thought. I called my psych doctor first because his nurse I like better and I explained to him the situation and he actually called me back quite quickly (say that 10 times..lol..) but irritated, doctor says wait til visit next week to talk about med’s. I really don’t care for my psych doctor all that much, but don’t have too much to choose from so I have to deal. I’m stuck so to say…If ya get my drift.

The pain doctor, kinda went the same way, left a msg on the voicemail, nurse called me back, she got the information from me and relayed to my pain doctor who in turn I at this moment am drawing a blank, I believe she too said next week at your appointment we shall talk about it. Inflammatories  Currently, we are having a severe drop in tempature so my fibro is actually starting to kick in so my memory rather sucks right now.

  • my shoulders feel like I got smacked by a mack truck.
  • My legs are aching something fierce.
  • My feet are killing me, between the burning like they are on fire and then the pins and needles (tho not sure if that is associated with fibro or not, it is currently happening)

Well, I believe I am going to go and take it easy and watch some Netflix…I am so hooked on it, Its better than regular cable. lol…You can watch full seasons. I am also hooked on hulu, that one rocks too. Sorry I can think of the other half of the name of this show, Greys Anatomy, I think thats what its called. If Im wrong, sorry… Fibrofog…sucks let me tell ya…lol..

All wild and crazy!!!

Hey everyone!! Today was absolutely one of the greatest days on the level of pain and just all around mood too!! I felt great and got a bunch of things accomplished. I feel great, I know I keep saying that but I do and I only get to say that but very few times. So when its a wonderful day I like to ring in the sunshine….

Today, My tot woke me which isn’t necessarily different that any other day but very low pain day I must say. I made her a bottle as she did her usual whine, but yet the monster wanted more. So, her usual breakfast was in order. Yes my friends you will see she gets what she wants unfortunately. I know that is bad, but she is little and soon I hope to change her little attitude fast before it’s too late, however I believe it is too late.

J~ had a friend sleep over and usually she remembers to put something in front of her door so ~D~ doesn’t go stopping in there and pounce like Tyson as we call her now, but however, this morning well, early afternoon she didn’t so, ~D~ woke them up. First it was yep, you guessed it, her big sis got stopped on and the her friend got the sweet side of her with a friendly cuddle. Aww, Tyson, can be cute. I didn’t hear any noise so I went in there and found the two cuddling on the bed, ~D~ was actually playing with her lip. How cute is that? So much for sleeping in more, right girls? I guess you will be putting something in front of the door next time hey!!!

~J~ Informs me that her friend is going home soon, so she starts her chores and I let her know since I did make some of the dishes last night from the cookies I was so ambitiously in the mood to make that I would help her do them. So she starts the water and lets them soak and gets in the shower. Well, me being the nice mother that I think or at least try to be….Yep that’s me…I go ahead and do the dishes up so that all she has to do when she gets out is dry and put them away, what I didn’t realize is that while she was showering and I was doing the dishes…Can you guess where I am going with this…Her water became colder as I used up all the hot water…oops..Sorry kid, just trying to help.

I still feel great…Can you believe it, Low pain still. I can’t believe it. So I carry on with things that need to be done. Heck I’m taking advantage of this low pain day, I don’t get them often along with my mood being great. So I jump on the computer and look over and the little monster is running a muck. Yep, Does mom ever just get a second for herself??? So, in the midst of the muckness (if that’s a word?) or at least my new momism, I get ready to yell something, she comes running over with her little lips all puckered up with a big ol kiss ready for me…All I could do was smile and giggle. At that moment I knew it was time for her nap and sure enough when I picked her up, thumb in mouth as the usual sign that she is ready for a nap and NOW, Its MOM time….Yay!!!

Which leads too my time with all of you!!! Now, its been several hours that I have been adding things here and there, I must say Mom here is ready for her nap. So until later…

Me!!!

Girls day out!!

So today was an awesome day!!! I had a great girls day with the oldest, she is 13 and she is still and always will be my baby. Went and got our hair cut and she looks amazing, I must say! She had so much hair we cut it off and with her idea, we are donating it to locks of love! It is two pony’s measuring 11 inches each and so thick, I so wish it was my hair, but she was so excited that it is going to a good place and of course not the garbage. 

Besides my chronic pain that I have my usual pain,  I feel good despite how I usually feel. I am so glad I didn’t have to cancel my girls day. I just cant get out of this funk I seem to be in and it is so horrible. I feel so bad cause it affects how I act and think and it affects everyone in the house. I know it affects everything even the fact that I have a hard time deciding what to make for dinner and that even gives me anxiety attacks. Anyone got any ideas?? 

 

Well, off to do the usual Saturday things..

love ya all,

Me!!